REVENGE IS SWEET    

    

Having the last laugh is the best revenge, isn’t it? 

Today, after being away for nearly 2 weeks, Eric is tired, slow to motivate, and he wants me to cheer him up.  To do that I must sit on him, literally, and talk to him.  I can talk about anything I want; he just wants me to help him take his mind off of work for a few minutes.  That’s not such a tall order.  However, I have a lot on my plate this morning and I want to get on with it which means now I am irritated. But I sit there anyway and begin to tell him a story-

“Last week the cleaning lady pissed me off.  She knew I was running behind schedule; I told her so when she arrived.  You know I love her but she wouldn’t leave me alone about your soap.  She chased me around the house telling me that I had to stop using bar soap in the shower.  I told her it was yours but she wouldn’t let it go.  So you know what I've been doing this week?  I’ve been steam cleaning the entire house so that when she returns in next week, she’ll have nothing to do.  How’s that for getting even!”

Eric says, “I hope you don’t get mad at me, do you?

“Well yes, I do get mad at you.  And I used to try and get even with you too – at least until you hurt your foot.  I purposely moved stuff in your way like the settee at the end of our bed so you would bang your big toe on it when you came in our room late at night.  You’re always waking me up.  And that’s why I did it; so you would feel my pain.”

After that Eric released me. Within an hour, he was back and hovering as usual.  I reminded him that blue-balls is another form of revenge.  With that, I walked out of the room to flip the bacon.  When I turned around, he scared the be-jesus out of me because I didn’t hear him follow me into the kitchen.    And then he laughed and said:

“Is that a masque on your face?  SWEET!”